The Midwestern Slayer Sleigh We Call Surly Karate Monkey, a Review

I live in the Midwest, Chicago to be exact - in the middling state of Illinois. We have excellent soil, strategically valuable geographic placement, a huge lake full of sunken cargo ships - a true land of wonders.

What we do not have is mountains. 

Confoundingly and compoundingly annoying in regards to this ostensibly mountain-bike-oriented blog post, that great soil I mentioned earlier makes for wretched cycling, as it's prone to erosion and doesn't drain moisture easily. And the strategic placement of my fine city means land is valuable and usually privately owned, so there isn't a lot of free and open space nearby, and that big lake of ours has a history of sending glaciers down from Canada every 10,000 years, which levels-out all the interesting terrain in the area. 

So, what this means vis-a-vis mountain biking is that a would-be-shedder must be confined to county parks on the no-man's-land between farms and suburbs, which are maintained by Boy Scouts and watched over by the fairly conservative Army Corps of Engineers, who ensure that the trails are only ridden when dry and follow certain rules regarding design that I won't go into except to say it's not exactly the type of trail management that encourages Redbull competitions. 

This is a long and drawn out way of saying that the full-suspension super-bikes I like to ride and write about here, here and here aren't actually great for the type of trails and riding available to me as a Midwesterner.  

Full-suspension super-bikes are ideal for smoothening out the minor bumps and lumps so the rider can focus on blasting through the trail and overcoming obstacles. But in the typical Chicagoland offroad trail system, the bumps and lumps are the obstacle. That's all there is, really: bumps, small hills, lumps, and turns. Oh, and trees. 

Given all that, the question then becomes, "What is the ideal Midwestern mountain bike?"

And to that, I give you the 1997ish? Schwinn Moab:

That's right. The Schwinn Moab is inexpensive, durable, and can fit in a hatchback without taking the front wheel off. The 26" tire size makes bumpy trails challenging and the general lack of technology encourages the rider to focus on fundamental skills. Maintenance is cheap and spare parts abundant. More to the point, most of the Midwest's MTB trails were initialized during the MTB boom of the early-to-mid-90's, so it isn't a stretch to say that the Moab is literally made for Midwestern off-roading. The perfect trail bike; All Hail Moab! 

Ahhh, crap. I forgot the Moab is discontinued. I also forgot that Schwinn sucks. What's a good second-best? A bike that's basically the same as the Moab, but with modern gadgets and geometry... Hmm, I know! 

The Second Best Bike: Surly's Karate Monkey (see photo at top of blog post)

Here's a short list of what's good about the Surly Karate Monkey:

1. It's made of steel, mostly, and can withstand years of abuse
2. The slack headtube angle and 140mm of travel on that suspension fork means riders can full-speed smash into obstacles without going head-over. 
3. Pwetty colors
4. Big fat tires (for muddin')
5. At about $2300 it's somewhat affordable
6. There's lots of braze-on "barnacles" for attaching racks and fenders, or whatever. 

In fairness, I should also explain what sucks about it, starting with the crappy, crappy stock components.

1. The stock seatpost is too short! I got the "medium" Karate Monkey, which is the correct size for a 5' 10" man, according to Surly's geometry chart and my innate knowledge of what shapes and lengths work for me. But after setting it to my body I looked down at the post to see I sat half-a-thumbnail above the min insert level!

This is pretty lame, and generally poor product management. I've complained before about the bad quality assurance of Surly's sister company, All-City, and this is just another example of a company that markets itself on attention to detail failing to uphold their professed standards. 

    2. They lied about the cranks on the parts sheet! When I ordered the LemonLime Karate Monkey they said they'll stock it with SRAM NX cranks or equivalent, but instead they gave me Truvative/SRAM Descendant cranks! CRAP!

 

I replaced them with cooler cranks in another post, which I suggest you check out if for nothing else than because I had just gotten a new camera and was testing the lens. 

            3.    Eh, $2300 is actually kinda a lot for a hard-tail that weighs about 38-pounds. 

            4.    The brakes aren't great. They're fine, I just wish for something better for the price. 

As for Handling and Ride Quality:

It's designed for a decent medium between stability and maneuverability, with a slight bias towards carving through the twisties, which is what Midwestern trails call for. On long bumpy descents with ruts and loose rocks I'm not so charmed. At speeds above 25 mph my confidence drops off, but that's normal with most trail bikes - a fair trade for good handling at normal trail speed. And this isn't a racing bike by any means. The fat tires and uprightness ask the rider to hit jumps and have fun at a reasonable pace. 

Speaking of jumps, the Karate Monkey's geometry is not so far off from that of a dedicated dirt jumper. While the front end is a little heavy, it can bound better than most full-suspension rigs. The robust frame and parts are good for this too because their weight helps keep the rubber-side down and every component on it can take a little thrashing without too much snappage. 

So, should you get it? 

Maybe. The Karate Monkey frame is a premium product, maybe the best steel hardtail trail bike with braze-ons on the market right now. But for ~$2300 you can get a lot of bike from the likes of Giant/Liv, Trek, or even Santa Cruz/Julianna, and those bikes come with better components and carbon fibers in the frame. 

But then again, following the premise of this blog post, you really don't need much to shred in the Midwest. So heck, maybe next time I'll just pick up an old 26"er from craigslist; save myself a few thousand bucks.